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Report: World's oldest new mom lied - U.S. Life - MSNBC.com

Why? Why? Sixty-six when she got pregnant, 67 when she delivered! WHY?!?

Omg... When I'm 66 my kids will be ... lemme think a minute... that's still 20 years and a few days away...my baby will be 37. My oldest will be over 44! Holy shit! There's no way in hell I'd be wanting another baby! I don't want one NOW. Shit, I'm hoping every month that this is my last period, that the whole baby-making machine will be closed permanently and not just the production line. I really can't imagine.

Okay, I get the whole thing about some women wanting to have a baby at any cost, any age, because they really like kids and want one or two. But cheese and rice! I'm thinking how my body feels at nearly 46, the aches and pains, the groans when I get off a chair, the pain in my knees when I kneel and have to get back up. It's hard enough some days just playing fetch with the dog. And this woman didn't adopt, or have another woman carry the baby....she went to a fertility clinic and became pregnant, lying about her age.

And good lord! Why is the cut off age for fertility clinics 55? What sane woman wants to put her body thru a pregnancy at 55??? My first pregnancy was at 20. Not so bad. The body is still pretty limber and heals relatively quickly. The only aches and pains are from the baby moving and your insides adjusting. The next time was at 27/28. Still not so bad, but definitely different. I couldn't imagine being pregnant in my 30s, and definitely not past 40.

Besides what pregnancy does to your own body, there are so many risk factors to consider when you get pregnant after 40. Risks to the baby. And everyone says they'd love their baby no matter what, birth defects, mental retardation... so be it. But why would you deliberately take a risk of giving birth to a baby knowing that the risks were significantly higher? Just because you felt the need, the desire, to know what being pregnant is like? Because you felt the need, the desire, to have a child bearing your own DNA? Please! Good for you, you want to be a mother... adopt for crying out loud! Or become a foster parent. But why risk your health and the health of an unborn baby just so you can experience the "miracle of birth" when your body has already shut down the factory??? There's a reason women go through menopause!

And, okay... doing something insane like putting your body through a pregnancy at 66 aside, let's think about raising the baby. Babies don't stay babies forever. They grow up. This woman will be 72 when her babies (she had twins!) start kindergarten. She'll be 80 when they become teenagers! Those poor kids! As if being a teenager isn't bad enough on it's own.. but then to be a teenager with a mother who's old enough to be your great grandmother!! Damn. She'll be 85 when they graduate high school. Eighty-nine when they finish college! It's ridiculous. All this assuming her health holds out and she lives that long. Yes, I know... no guarantees any of us will live through today, but really... who is going to raise those kids if she drops over tomorrow? Five years, ten years... they'll become wards of the state (she's in England, so not sure how that goes, but you get the picture).

It's selfish. Sure, she wants to be a MOM... well, those kids are going to want a Mom around for most of their lives. I've had my mom for the last 45 years and counting, Thank You, God... will those babies have theirs that long? And even if they do, will she be coherent? Or will they have to take of her before they can even think about having their own families?

 

When I was still living in Detroit (which seems like a lifetime ago), and Mr Wonderful still believed all was okay and we'd be married forever (and living together, he was never very realistic), life was most unpleasant. However, what cracks me up the most is the changes since then. Particularly his change in attitude concerning my son and his friends.

The rules were simple: no friends over for dinner, no feeding of friends, no more than one friend spending the night and only on weekends, no friends spending the night on weekends his kids were visiting. If any of these rules were violated, I never heard the end of it even tho I didn't agree with any of them (except the no friends spending the night on school nights). I was always raised that if you were eating when someone came over, you offered them food.

OMG.. his obsession with who could and couldn't eat just drove me crazy!!! His belief was always "you have to earn your food".. except for his kids, who seemed to have the rights to do whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted. We used to argue about it quite often.

Anyway, there were just some things he would get all hissy pissy about. I was always too soft with Alex and too hard on his kids. In truth, neither statement was true. I just believed there was one set of rules in the house and they applied at all times to every child who was in the house, whether or not I gave birth to them. This included all Alex's friends. Any and all friction between me and his kids was a direct result of him twisting things around and telling them things that weren't true. He told his kids I didn't like them!!!

A couple weeks ago he and I were talking on the phone and I finally had the chance to tell him how he screwed things up for me and his kids, especially my relationship with his daughter. The thing is, he actually listened to the words I was saying, he got it... then apologized to me for the things he did and for not doing what should have been done. I said  "good. Now you know what not to do in your next relationship. It's important you learn from past mistakes."

So.... what I'm observing life is like in the Bachelor Pad now that it's just the two of them.. the ex and the kid..  Alex can have as many friends over as he wants. They can eat whatever they want. One friend can spend the night on a school night. Two, three, sometimes four friends can spend the night on weekends, even if his kids are there. It's like he's trying to be "the cool dad". The thing is, they already know what he's like. "Cool" has never described him.

Or, maybe, this is just another ploy to make me see how wonderful  he is and how I walked away from a good man. Whatever. I know who he is, what he is, how he is.... and he ain't no Bryan, that's for sure! It's all  just sugar coating on a stale slice of bread that's starting to grow mold. Just not good for me.

... or late, depending on your frame of reference. Late would be a more accurate description from my point of view, but I'm up so I might as well write. Right?

Yeah, this will be yet another rambling journey thru the wasteland of my mind. Or so it seems.

Found the perfect way to watch American Idol, at least the audition shows. DVR. What did I do without it? How did I survive? Oh, that's right.. I didn't watch too much because I was always working second shift!!  Kind of like now. Except now I can record whatever I want to watch, as long as I don't want to record more than two shows at the same time. Anyhow, I digress... watching A.I. It's great. I can fastforward not only thru the commercials, but all the annoying crap the ousted wannabe contestants spew from their mouths can also be omitted. I love it. Then, when I've finished, I just delete it to make room for more stuff I just have to see. Okay, to be brutally honest, Bryan insists on recording more shows than I do. Sometimes he'll even watch them in the same month they were recorded, lol.

Speaking of Bryan... and I do often, I know. He's threatening to shut down his blog. Thinks no one loves him anymore. Of course that isn't true. I tried explaining to him that everyone is busy, that blogging has lost some of its appeal for some people, that maybe his "loyal followers" have things going on in their lives that don't allow for the extra time to read his innermost thoughts. Anyhow, you should all go take a peak. There's actually a couple things on there that are quite funny. If he goes thru with it and shuts it down, you can bet I'll post the funnier things here. Or maybe I'll let him "guest write" now and again, lol. Not that I'm getting alot of hits, but it doesn't bother me. I know where the love is, lol.

Oh, and on the subject of blogging friends... I've deleted that stupid useless pointless friends list from my blog. Grrr. It irritated the crap out of me! Most of the people on that crappy list I didn't know, never or rarely read, and it makes things go slow. So now I've gone back to the old fashioned way. Yes, there are people I don't have on the list, but that doesn't mean you're forgotten or not wanted, only that it's late and I ran out of steam. If you've left a comment you'll most likely be added at some point this week.

And back to work.... whew! Thought I was going to have to work Friday night and Sunday, the two days I'm scheduled off. Wouldn't be a big deal except that tomorrow/today (Thursday at any rate) will be Day Ten without a day off, two of which I worked alone. My dogs are barking, my legs are weak, my old body is protesting loudly. I can't get to sleep at night and then I sleep way later than I want to. Anyhow, I don't have to work. But I might go in Sunday morning just to get some OT. Oh! And we've hired some people!!! Yay!!! Now let's hope they're keepers and worth the time it takes to train them.

The ice is gone. Snow hasn't yet arrived. It's supposed to get up to the mid 30s tomorrow (Thursday). Okay,snow is predicted for the weekend sometime, but nothing major. I have to remind myself it's the middle of January, it's supposed to be snowy and cold. Then I remind myself it's the middle of January - spring is just around the corner!!! Really, it is.

I have been down here for four and a half months. Wow. Told Bry that by the time I'd been living with Mr Wonderful for this long, we'd had countless fights; he'd asked me to visit my parents for the weekend, then begged me to come back; I'd packed up most of my stuff and was about to move out at least once....  me and Bry are still in the Honeymoon Phase. And it's great. I hope we stay this way for years and decades to come. I know, I know... I'm sickening. It's getting old. Blah blah blah. I won't apologize, I waited to long to find what I have. So there!

Oh! Oh! Got the TV on and am seeing a commercial thingy paid program for Memory Foam mattresses. OMG... you need to get one! They are fantastic! Ours isn't the one we fell in love with, but it's a thousand dollar mattress we bought for less than half price at Famous Warehouse. It is wonderful. Everything the ads say about them is true. Yep, yep, yep. And they beat the hell out of an air mattress, lmao.

Okay, that's it for this morning/night/whatever the hell it is.

I sometimes hate, just hate, when the weathermen are right. Damn winter. Damn ice. I hate ice. I really do. I don't even like ice in my drinks (unless there's alcohol in it, then it just isn't the same without it).

The weather people said it was coming. So I mentally prepared myself. Didn't really do any other preparations. Stupid. *gotta do something about that procrastination disease I have*

The warning was/is from 6pm Friday until  6pm Sunday. Maybe later now. I quit listening. Why bother? The rain came Friday afternoon. The temperature dropped considerably. Quickly. When I left work at nearly eleven Friday night, I had to buy an ice scraper to get into the truck. Thankfully, the roads were just wet, not icy.

The power went out. Ten minutes before I left work. Not at work. At home. Yay. Our street is at the top of a hill, so when I got to it I could look down and see the city below, all lit up. And the street lamps were on on the street that leads to our skinny little alley that leads to our little whatever it's called at the end of the lane. And everything on the north side of the street was lit up. I turned onto our alley. Dark.

So, we had a nice candle lit evening for a few hours. Cozy. But I didn't get to make my pot of chili I'd been hungering for. Got to hear some good stories, though. So not a bad night.

Woke up this morning to this:

The last picture is of the grass. That isn't snow. It's ice. I hate ice.

There was also this:

it's the antenna on Nigel, Bryan's little Mazda MX3

So, that was nice. Oh.. but before I ventured outside, I was awakened by the phone ringing. Third shifter letting me know that the first shifter had called off. She was literally iced in. Seriously. She lives in a trailer (watched a comedian once who said that when you move to Missouri you're given a trailer, lol... I didn't get mine! Except in Florida, I've never seen so many trailer parks!). Anyway, her door was frozen solid shut. She could not get out.

Thankfully, the other first shifter showed, but was an hour and a half late. Her van was froze solid shut.

Ah, yes... work. I have something to bitch about now, lol. You lucky lucky people! Okay, first, I had to work with the obnoxious boor Friday night after all. For some reason she was extremely nice to me. Almost pleasant. Hmm. Go figure. I still sent her home 2 hours early. She thought I was doing her  a favor. Yeah, right. Whatever.

Today, the one girl who was gone but then was allowed back decided to pull a no-call/ no-show. Yay. She's gone for good now. So the first shifter stayed an hour and half late and the third shifter came back to help out. He's a good guy.

Then... then.... it gets better, lol. Obnoxious Boor was supposed to work third shift tonight. Guess what? She called off. Says there's fallen branches on her road and she couldn't get out.  Amazingly enough, every time bad weather hits, she has some sorry lame ass excuse for not being able to make it. She says she's gonna try to make it tomorrow. I hope not! I'm covering for the bitch who was a no-call/no-show and I'd rather not have to work with Obnoxious Boor. Again. Ever.

So... it's real fun. I'm waiting for Bryan to come home now. He's a little late. I'm trying not to worry.

Aahh, she sighs in relief. One night over, and perhaps a reprieve tonight. Aahh, she sighs once more, knowing that Sunday she'll be home all day with the love of her life, no working that night with anyone (provided there are no call-offs). And again... aahh.

I made it thru my entire six hours of having to work with the boor last night. I didn't kill her, mame her, or otherwise do anything that would have meant not only me getting fired, but going to jail as well. The boss told me I could leave at 8 as opposed to staying until 10. She'd also asked me to do a beer audit and put invoices in the computer for her. Ah, yes, happy to do it... that's time away from the mouth that ate St Louis.

However, there were times I actually had to interact with the woman. Those weren't pleasant, by any standards.

The first time, one of the co-workers we lost this week came in to get her check. Evidently, there'd been a communication error between said co-worker and boss. Details aren't important here. What is, is that The Mouth decided it was her place to tell Co-Worker what had been said in her absence. After I talked quietly, in private, with Co-Worker, and all the customers were gone, I took The Mouth into the office and very calmly explained to her that no matter what she may have heard from anyone, it wasn't her place to say anything. She replied in her loud obnoxious way that she was merely repeating what she heard. Tact isn't in her repertoire of understanding.

The second time we had the need to interact was while I was conducting a cigarette count. I just could not get her to  understand simple logic. Look, you count the cigarettes behind the counter, subtracting only the cigs from the count that are sold before you run a report. Once you've counted those cigs and ran the report from the register, every cigarette in the store has been accounted for, both those that are physically present and previously sold. Then you go in the office and count the backstock of cartons. Easy as that. And if a carton is sold while you're counting, you add it to the count. Not so hard to understand, is it? Obviously, I'm wrong.  The bitch wanted to get into a shouting match with me about whether or not all the cigarettes had to be subtracted after I counted. Y'all would have been so proud of me! Despite the fact I literally wanted to throttle her neck just to get her to shut the hell up for five seconds, I very calmly and quietly told her to not yell at me and to shut up and listen so I could explain it to her. She did neither. Just kept insisting I didn't know what I was doing.

Anyway, one of the girls who we thought we lost this week is coming back, but on a limited basis and on probation of sorts. She's going to work Sunday night, so as long as she actually shows, I don't have to work. Yay. Not that I wouldn't like the hours, just YAY that I don't have to work with the mouth.

The Mouth asked that same girls husband last night if he'd see if the girl wanted to work tonight for her. Please!!! Please, let it be! If not her, then maybe the other girl will be allowed back in the fold and she'll work with me tonight. If not, then I'm sending the mouth home at eight since I agreed to stay a little later so the third shifter can take care of some stuff before coming in.

Seriously, this woman is trouble. For everyone.

Yes, there is a conspiracy here. We're all conspiring to get her to quit, or to get her fired. Whatever it takes to get peace in the store again. Trust me, the only reason any of us are there is because we truly enjoy working together. The pay sucks, the benefits suck, and we  have one of the crappiest stores in the company... but we love each other. And that's rare.

So she has to go.

As with all things, when it's going too well, you know damn well something's going to happen to screw it up. And it did.

The job, people.. the job. Relax, take a deep breath, relax, lol.

Remember back a few entries, when I wrote how much I enjoy working there, and that I like everyone I work with? Well, a new girl/woman had just begun working at that time and I didn't really know her. Hadn't worked with her yet. My opinion has changed.

She's loud, obnoxious, doesn't ever shut up, and airs her dirty laundry and everything else she feels like pouring out to anyone and everyone. Customers can't stand her, and our customers have low expectations. Besides that, she's ugly and dumpy. Now, we all know you can be loud and obnoxious but if you're cute it's somewhat tolerable. You can be ugly and dumpy as long as your personality is pleasant. But you can never get away with being the entire combination.

When I first complained about her to Bryan, his response was a knowing smile and the question: "are you sure it's just not you, sweetheart?" My reply was said with buggy eyes and indignation: "yes! I know I can be bitchy-catty, but this time it's not ME. No one likes her!" Then along came our work Christmas Party and Bryan had the opportunity to meet her for more than two minutes. Of course, he truly is a nice guy who gets along with most people (unless you cut him off while he's driving, but that's another story), and maybe because he didn't have to work with her, she didn't bother him too much. However, as soon as she was gone, a co-worker looked at me and asked if "the mouth" had left yet. When I nodded, he sighed and smiled and made the remark that now we could all hear each other, or something similar to that.

I can't stand her. No one can. Seriously, the only one who tolerates her is the boss. She probably wouldn't if she had to work an entire shift alone with the boor. I get that great honor... Thursday, Friday, and Sunday nights.

We lost three employees this week which is making it tough on the rest of us, who have to pick up the slack and cover the empty shifts. However, I think we're all agreed that if the boor made it four, we'd work ten hour shifts happily just to not have to deal with her anymore.

Seriously, it's bad enough that as convenience store clerks, we're forced to put up with rude customers who babble away on their cell phones, pointing to what they want us to fetch for them; listen to them whine about their lives and their families and their jobs; put up with money being thrown across the counter at us like we're trained monkeys and they get a kick out of watching us 'do tricks'...  who wants to work with someone who's worse than that??? And... on top of the customers bitching to us about 'woe is their life', now we have to listen to them bitch about her.

She needs to go, simple as that. And trust me, we're all working on ways to make it happen. The boss made a comment today about us remaining employees working as a team. . . lol... on this one topic we're agreed.

The boss is leaving on a cruise next week... we need to get some new hires in and started by then. However, we'll have two weeks to make the boors' life so miserable at the store that she just might do us all a favor and up and quit while the boss is gone. If not before. I have ways of making people do what I want, lol... and I'll be working with her three nights this week. And - well - I am one of her bosses.  *evil grin*

Funny, how insane spouses become more insane and difficult to deal with, but in a new and completely different way, when you leave them. And they come up with a delightful myriad of reasons to explain why you left. Of course, none of the reasons they create have anything to do with the actual reason for your leaving. And if another person is involved, it's naturally the fault of that person for the marriage coming to an abrupt ending.

That it really wasn't so abrupt doesn't play into the scenario. Insane spouses can't see the marriage coming apart bit by bit over a period of time. Sometimes even the sane partner needs a nudge, a slap in the face, a definitive reason to leave. But marriages don't "just end". There's always something leading up to it. Often times, bad marriages last longer than they should out of habit. Or fear.

Fear is a factor in quite a few life decisions. I think sometimes we stay where we shouldn't because of it. Fear of the unknown. Of being alone. Fear of starting over. Fear of what the other person will do.

Maybe this is why insane spouses become even more insane after you've left them. You've already thought it all out by the time you leave, or at least mulled it over enough to know it's the right thing to do. The person left behind, being insane and/or blind to what's been going on, has to deal with the situation of picking up the pieces of their lives. A sensitive person might feel a bit sorry for the spouse in that predicament. That, however, can lead to being walked on in an entirely new way.

The 'left behind' spouse uses whatever tools are available to "get even" with the spouse who did the leaving. Usually it's the kids. What you've done to their psyches is unforgivable. They hate you. They want nothing to do with you. This is, of course, words coming from the 'left behind spouse', not the children themselves.

In reality, although the children might be somewhat confused, and there may be some bitterness, the truth is that they handle it all quite well. As long as they don't have one parent bad-mouthing the other or placing blame where it shouldn't be.

Another 'tool' might be guilt. "You never gave us a chance." "If only you'd told me how you felt we could have worked this out." "I can change. I will change." The truth is that  you probably did try to work things out, you did give the marriage every chance available, you did tell the other person how you felt, and their changing won't make a difference because it's only going to be temporary. All cosmetic. Surface changes.

The moral of this is that you never really know a person until you leave them.

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Yes, we're going thru all this right now. The Storm says his kids can't stand him, that they're totally devastated, blah blah blah. She's told him that the kids don't want to see him. Naturally, this upsets him. But then he'll talk to the kids and wow! They're okay. They ask to see him. She's certifiable. She refers to me as "that woman" or "that thing you live with". Lovely. Extremely grown-up and mature. I just don't know why Bry wouldn't want to be with her. Such a friendly likable woman she is.

Mr Wonderful is just the opposite. He's doing his best to be nice to me. Friendly. He even talks about "being mature about all this stuff."  I bite my tongue. Actually, though, we do get along pretty darn good now. As long as we're six hundred miles apart and don't have to see each other on a daily basis. He's becoming a friend of sorts. But no one I want to hang out with. At least I like him now, which is more than I could say six months ago. And except for when he first found out about Bryan, he's never said anything bad about him to me. I wouldn't put up with it and he knows it. I think somewhere in his head he also realizes that there's no way we'll ever get back together again so he's doing what he has to to get along.

With luck, in a year things will be better. Or not. I already have experience dealing with an ex-wife in the picture who tries to use the kids for leverage. Okay, in The Storms favor, she did call and invite Bryan over to spend a couple hours with his kids Christmas morning, although there's not a doubt in my mind she had ulterior motives in mind. Hmph. As if.

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On a lighter, much different note:  I got my hair cut. Yay! Not real short, it's just above my shoulders and cut in layers that bounce around. Liking it muchly, thank you. Not a drastic change, but enough to be something new.

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The boy went home Tuesday. He's thrilled. Not that he doesn't want to be around me, he's just happy to be around his friends again. Also let him get his eyebrow pierced New Years Eve. Damn kid... he's been bugging me for over a year to get it done, so when I finally give in and tell him he can have it, he has to call his friends to take a survey of whether or not to do it. Geesh!

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